I want to run

But I’m still here.

To run, not from God

– but from the people who use his name.

I journey, I work, I pray

I grow (I think), I play

And then, just when I think the hard work is clear

– then I am told again, “You are not ok…

You don’t match up, you let us down!”


God knows I seek with all my heart a life of integrity and service.


And so I want to run, escape to a place where it’s ok to be me.

I cannot go – God put me here.

But here hurts – not at a physical level

Here hurts who I am, who I am wanting to be.

Here negates, crushes, diminishes, destroys.

And I am still here.


Written by Brenda Timmer